As most of you are aware, I'm sure, Victoria is a highly unpleasant, tense and crowded place of a rush hour, compounded sporadically by the utter lack of service provided by one or other (or more usually both) of the underground lines which serve it. This was very much the case this morning as I made my way down to the buses, station closed sirens a-wailing.
As expected the queue for the 38 (my route of choice in my quest for tube avoidance) was nothing short of monumental, but being the obliging little commuter droid I joined and didn't make too much fuss (I was, frankly, nowhere near awake enough to even care). A bus or so later I was approaching boarding an about to arrive, blissfully empty bus when my view is obscured by a head of long, maroon hair. She looks around, as if to feign she is lost, or looking for something, but as the bus arriver her purpose is clear! And so, I tapped her on the shoulder and asked her why she was standing at the front of the queue.
Now, I like to think that I am a fairly well spoken, quick witted person. This situation called for a biting put-down, unsheathe my rapier-like wit and destroy this eeevil queue jumper like the heathen she was! But no. She responded "There's plenty of room, don't worry about it." At this point I, and several other people in the queue may I add, resorted to a vicious barrage of the colourful words and associated comments about antisocial behaviour in her general direction, and boarded the bus.
Not my finest hour, but quite satisfying none the less. I'm sure I'll have come up with some great lines by this evening - but frankly given it was 8:45, and I was yet to have my morning Starbucks fix I think I did OK. 'Silly cow' - My my, I'm the next Wilde.